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So this weekend things was very… different, to say the least. The weekdays proceeding were full of my preconceived notions of what it would be like: what I’d do, who I’d spend it with, and all of that good stuff. At the very start, as the hourglass turned to the dawn of my last few seconds of work, things shifted. It didn’t go according to my plan. I was livid; I had made all the preparations for it, and here circumstance was, baring it’s arrogant head at my inability to control the events of time and chance. What could be more cruel than this?

As I went home, fuming somewhat but understanding that not everything goes as it seems, I got this brilliant idea for something we had to do in church later, and it shocked EVERYONE. Even those who were with me on stage were surprised at the sudden improvisation; it was a HUGE success. Going home, I was grinning from ear to ear, but not because of my brilliance, but His.

My plan failed, but His was an astounding success.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” And I’d like to emphasize that God has an END in mind. We tend to “get livid” when things don’t go according to our will, but He knows what He’s doing…. so count it a joy when curve balls come your way!

And so, I understood that it’s not my will, but His that is what prevails. In light of that, I began to ponder my own life; it’s direction, purpose, and yes, it’s will. In my pursuit of passion, I have undertaken many different approaches to serving my Savior. At one point, it was all good; I labored for the kingdom, trusting God for my reward. And then, work started. It has become a much greater challenge for me to keep my obligations  intact, and so I recognized that certain aspects of my life began to slip from my grasp. For those who follow up on my real talk sessions, you would have seen the entry “What’s the point?” which resulted from this. Yet again I asked myself this one question.

Is all this really worth it?

I am not trying to repeat myself, but I am approaching it from a different angle this time. I perhaps should rephrase my question, asking, “Is all this what God wants me to do; are these challenges His will?”

Truly it is better to give than to receive, and my giving of my time and effort has been a blessing to both others and myself. But the fatigue, the aching muscles that don’t get time to rest, the times when trying to facilitate everything falls apart… Is it really worth it?

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”

Everything we do, is (or should be) toward fulfilling His perfect will, to work toward His pleasure,His delight and His end. It’s not about losing ourselves, but finding our true selves in Him. So matter what you do, and I am saying this to myself as well, don’t forget Proverbs 3:5-6 which says,

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

Have a blessed day folks, and remember: It’s not about you; it’s all about Me! that’s what God says to you in His word.

Love you all! 😀

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