The word’s of our pastor, good old Pastor Tony, echoed in my mind as I rolled off the covers that Sunday afternoon. The cream walls greeted me with a warm smile as I turned to the night stand to check the time. The red LED lights glared back, stating “4:15” with no emotion, flare or comedy.
The pain of not being able to go to youth group stung once more, piercing my soul with its twisted dagger; the name I dubbed my circumstance that day. It was at that moment, I began to ponder all the good times I had, back during vacation when I could have gone because I would not have reached home too late and be tired for school the next morning. The late nights, the fun activities in church, and not to mention the food… every instance engraved in my mind like the grooves on a record, playing their own symphonies of excitement and passion.
And not to mention Christina.
She felt like everything to me; her eyes like black pools that drowned me every time I stared at them; her body, not too slim, but curvaceous and healthy. Best of all, her heart. I remember clearly that day when we danced; before the ‘red dress’ experience. I told God then that I wanted to be bold, and not miss out on life because of my shyness. And on that night, I danced with her… I never knew she existed until that moment, and although it was subtle, I believe that she had planted herself in my heart at that definitive moment. She was always kind, and sought others above herself. How could you not love her?
And so my thoughts had drifted me off to the bathroom to shower, where my ramblings of the past have somehow drummed toward the future. In my stupor of steam, I heard myself utter an unusual phrase, “because on March 27th I receive Christina as my girlfriend..”
Honestly, what just happened?
At first, I paused. Then, I panicked. I ran to my room, fast as I could (after finishing my shower quickly of course) and took some time to ponder these words. Is this God’s plan for my life? No, it HAS to be His plan. I believed then that this wasn’t just a plan for my life, but for ours, and that all I could do for the moment was pray, and know that His plan shall come to pass.
“Maybe staying home wasn’t so bad after all,” I mused.