Yes, it’s been awhile, and I miss offloading whatever comes to mind, and so (time permitting) I will be able to get these out to you all in the next few days… cause I have a lot to say.
Really and truly, there hasn’t been much between ‘her’ and I, because we both happen to be in our own separate worlds, which, for now, is just fine with me. Just this Friday I heard that she had popped in church to check up on me, although I hadn’t seen her, but nevertheless, it was a nice gesture and it made a smile brim my lips. Which brings me to the reflections of today: these phantom traces of what once was.
One cannot help but recall the times when the sphere of their existence was once incident upon the that of another, especially when it blossomed not only into a beautiful relation, but a significant change within the existence itself. It’s like the scent of your perfume that you like that you no longer have within your reach. It is perhaps accented with little whims and fancies of what you recall it to be, but such is the fallacy and bliss of memory.
I remember that no matter how much I tried, there was, and I believe there still is, this one thing that I could never truly grasp about her. Even as she slips silently across the fringes of my conscious (she literally lives about a 3 minutes walk from where I frequent every week) It’s perhaps something that I never will grasp…
For whim and fancy sake, I shall call it the Zecks Uncertainty Principle 😀
Perhaps it is because the experiences of my own life does not line up enough with that of what she went through, but to see both rivers flow into the same stream is just one more thing that makes me in awe of the beauty of life. To me, it’s the source of who she is; the synergetic, supportive, strong and charismatic person that she has bloomed to be, dappled with traits that bring these to life in such a way that is unique to all but her. It’s how who she is can scream at you without saying but one word… nothing short of awesome, in my book.
Even as I go on each day, “phantom traces” of ‘her’ are seen in me… the way I talk, the way my passions have surfaced to such a degree that I never thought possible; the confidence that I emanate, proud of who I am, and not because of whatever traces remain. But because I am no one else but me, fashioned with a marvellous design and free to be who I am destined to be, and no one else. There’s no shadow to live in; but simply to walk out of the darkness and into the marvellous light…
She taught me that 🙂