All these years, I’ve walked and walked. I journeyed through some storms, some trials… even some dark places that i’d wish never to return to. As a matter of fact, A LOT of dark places that I’d wish never to return to. But what of them now? They are all but figments of my imagination; gruesome images that scathe my happiness from time to time. No matter how hard and unbearable they where, they always came to an eventual end. These trauma oozing circumstances that hardened my heart, accompanied by subtle sweetness that somehow carried me through, all shaped me to be who I am at this moment.
But what of it? What of me?
It would seem that even as life goes on, that challenges somehow evolve; some may say that they were always there, but as I grew older and wiser, it was only then that I became aware of them. Others, well they say that my problems are a concoction of my own mental genius, tailor made in grand fashion to be a challenge to my own “entertainment”. These say that my problems are based mainly on my perspective of the situation, and very little on the actual circumstance to which I am bound.
So does that make me a slave to circumstance, a slave-master who likes to push himself, or both? It reminds me of a dog chasing it’s own tail, or even after the cars that are virtually impossible to reach. What are we striving for? Does our intent lead to more? Or do we stop there? At what point do we say that we are content?
I believe that the answer to that question is perhaps simpler than you’d think. I say that the point at which we should say that we are content…. is NOW. Dreams are only dreams until you wake up to achieve them (cliche I know) and wallowing about because of want is only a hindrance to acquiring those wants. Ambition is a tool that can break down the walls that block us, but also the weapon that plunge our hearts straight through; all that’s left of us is the empty shell of a man whose life has been spilled out upon the ground.