The following are a few of the many things that I have wanted to get off my chest for some time now, some more than others. I’d usually give some explanation or context as to why I’m doing this, but maybe we’ll get into that a little later, ok? I warn you, this is going to be selfish, ignorant of perhaps everyone but me, and for all I know, directed at people I actually know…

Here goes!

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I’m sick of Pastors putting on a ‘pastor voice’ to speak to their congregation. I’m sick of people saying things when they pray, and not even knowing why they do, like the overly abused word ‘just’ and quoting random scriptures just because they heard other people say them. I’m tired of Christians striving to be religious and not Christlike. I hate when people (including myself) shoulder things by themselves saying they can handle it, and end up falling short in the long run. I’m weary of choosing to help others till the point where I am to weak to help myself. I’m sick of people being so mentally oppressed by circumstance that they don’t see how powerful they really are. I’m sick of giving everything my all and then handing my dregs to God. I’m sick of choosing cheap alternatives to end up wasting the rest of my money anyway. I hate when people make assumptions about me, whether good or bad. I’m sick of school taking away from my time with my friends. I’m tired of circumstances forcing me to choose between one or the other when I really want to do both. I’m quite fed up being chained down by responsibilities. I hate that I still haven’t found my thing. I really hate when circumstances make me start to doubt my convictions. I hate being trapped in my own mind when things aren’t that well. I hate the feeling I get when people ask me to do major tasks that are a long way off; the icky feeling inside that doesn’t go away until it’s done. I hate planning to do work but then getting caught up in something else and shirking it off till tomorrow. I hate waking up to find out I have work to do. I hate being to scared to say what I really want to say when things don’t bode too well. I hate that I had to make a draft of this post because I had to leave before I could finish…

I could have probably gone on and on about things that didn’t go my way, but at the end of the day, it doesn’t always really get you anywhere. I mean, it felt pretty good to get it off my chest, mind you, but other than that, it didn’t really do anything for me. All that complaining leaves for you is a tall order of things you need to try to change; for those you can’t, well, just pray to Jesus about it and hope for the best.

(photocredit to http://www.mikebonales.com/EN/frustrated-bunny.html)

Imaginary walls

Imaginary walls

Built up to shut me in

Constructed by mental constructs

That seek to make me cringe;

To flinch!

Cower in my insecurities

To mistake my imagination

For what  is indeed reality

Imaginary walls

Built to surround

To decapitate my ascension

And pin me to the ground

Cut me off from outside

To hide safely, alone

Free to play with all the demons

That take residence in my home

Imaginary walls

Painted with graffiti

Pictures drawn of the outside world

Or what I imagined it to be

Beautiful; toxic.

 Poisoned by what I think

Defiling me as I am enticed

To consume these illusory drinks.

Imaginary walls

Daunting but for a while

Until revelation kicks in

 I see how I was beguiled.

Imaginary walls,

Laugh while I make not a sound

After I’ve marched this seventh time

All your lies are coming down.

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Through the eyes of Her Majesty

She had just returned from the meeting of the Elder Council; talks were still ensuing with the Spanish lords from the East, but fatigue weighted her brows and without an afternoon’s reprieve, she feared that she’d be too rash in her decision making. Leaving her advisers behind, she descended the stone stairway.

“Your Highness,” came a voice she recognized at once. It was Sir Joel; a comely young man, wise beyond his years and a joyful conversation when she needed. “The King asked me to deliver this to you.” She accepted the package with a nod, and followed her guard to her quarters. Well aware of the times, she had no doubt as to what the contents of the golden case could have been. She peered into it’s hallowed cavity, finding the left side of a pair of earrings; a golden hoop it was, dotted across its length with diamond patterned kunzite gemstones. A letter was affixed  to the piece, written and signed by none other than the king himself.

“In fields of sapphire, topaz and agate orchids we shall meet;
– the King”

 Her heart bubbled from within. He remembered, she thought. It was the place in which they first met. The gardens were not merely what they were back in those days, but then again, neither were they. It was merely an open field where they were nothing but peasants strolling on by. Thoughts of meetings, treaties and stressful negotiation fizzled in the euphoria that she now felt, and for a moment, she was nothing but that little girl who fell in love with a boy who happened to pass by. She dismissed her Guard and called for her chariot.

Under normal circumstances, this would have been the indicator that she finally lost it, especially in light of the wars around their little kingdom. Her guard was wise to obey her, however, for they all knew what day it was, and to get on the bad side of the King was never a good thing. Her loyal steeds, Brixen and Norse were the only ones allowed to accompany her on this journey. Flailing manes of ebony and hoary white poked their wiry hairs round the lower rim of her vista of the courtyard she now ploughed through. Patrons of the Monarch darted to and fro, dodging the brunt of her reckless abandon. They were well aware that she had her moments, when the bridles she placed on her demeanour would vanish, letting loose the beautiful foal within. They didn’t altogether mind though, for it was a pleasant distraction from the tension the war created and many a young man found themselves captured by the passion that she displayed, wishing the same intensity of love to befall them in their futures.

After an eventful ride of knocking down a melon stand, almost totalling another carriage (that may or may not have belonged to an ambassador from another kingdom) and splashing a  barrel of water on  an old couple, she rolled up to the outskirts of the gardens, easing on the reigns and slowing her steeds to a brisk trot. She had every mind to burst through the gates, but she had caused enough mayhem already through the streets and thought it wise to don some decorum in front of the soldiers that kept watch over their fields. She was expecting to be soon in the arms of her love, but that wasn’t quite the case.

Another hoop, another message.

“It brings me pain to disappoint, but I was forced to take my leave.
I shall see you where the sand meets the sea.”

 At first, she was a bit disappointed. No sooner had she turned round to head where she knew he thought of than a new vigour stirred up within her. She raced off into  the distance, abandoning customs and etiquette once again. Little did she know, this was going to be a common theme. With each destination, another piece of jewellery, and another message. She was beginning to grow a little frustrated with her king, but with each trip she took, something curious was happening. Every leg of the journey made her look more like royalty, but feel less like one. She sparkled and jingled her way through the nation, sweating and sighing with each tinge of disappointment when upon arrival, her love was not to be found.

That was, until she came upon a peaceful river near a rocky hillside that she had never seen before. She met no soldiers there; not even a crest bearing their nation’s emblem; a Lion with an axe in its maw, was there to greet her, but the visage of a crown bearing figure with his feet in the water. She said not a word, but dipped her aching feet in the cool, refreshing waters and slipped into his arms.

“I come here when being a king gets too much for me; I can just be myself here. I wanted you to not just be a queen, but be yourself. That’s the woman I fell in love with.” Her lips curled into a peaceful smile. She tugged his arm gently, nestled her head into his chest and fell asleep. Just like they always did…

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So that’s basically what I did for my valentine’s day gone just yesterday. I may be no king, but I want her to feel like royalty. She certainly looks like it 😉 I made her go all about our campus looking for me, finding little hearts with messages where I said I would be in them. She eventually found me, and we enjoyed a nice, but brief time together. Classes got in the way of our afternoon, however. :/ 

We all may not have had a valentine this year, but that doesn’t mean that we are devoid of love. It’s important to recall the love of family and friends who help us enjoy each and every day of our lives. More than that, we need to always recall the love of Jesus Christ, who made it clear that He loved us when He died and rose again just so that He could spend the rest of eternity with us. I never seen anyone else top that before 😉

I love you all! I hope you enjoyed this little piece right here, and as always, God bless you!

What is my thing????

I just returned from a weekend camp yesterday with a Christian group on campus, and boy did I have a good time 🙂 I will talk about that one later, but not today. So recently, I have had this obsession with not having a “thing”. So what is this thing I’m talking about? Well simply put, that one hobby that people can identify with you. For instance, my brothers all have things. My eldest is quite passionate about cars, another football and the one just before me loves aquatic fish. One of my close friends is a techie, while the other knows just about everything about music.

So what’s my thing???

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I’ve had many hobbies before, but I can’t really say that any of them qualify as a “thing” for me. To top it off, I really can’t say why I want to have a thing so badly, but it’s been on my mind for days and I can’t shake the thought of it. I’ve had many encounters with writing, art and perhaps some gaming, but they just don’t stick like I’d like that “thing” to. it’s quite belligerent this feeling… it’s like that little spunky pup that you know is going to bark his heart out once you round the corner; it’s there, and while you walk that road, it’s all you can think about. And I’m walking that road, all right.

I’ve had many mental attempts to get back into the grind of those aforementioned hobbies, but none struck gold just yet. Perhaps it’s just a mental block or something, but for now, I’m just going to have to either get some “thing” or get on with my life. You know, even Jesus had a thing. His thing, believe it or not, was us! We were all that He could ever think about. Even now He’s sitting at the right hand of God making intercession for us. Isn’t that cool? He even died on a cross for us! Now THAT is some serious dedication for His thing. He really is one cool guy 😉

Now I’m not saying that I must have some super awesome life saving “thing” that makes such an impact on the world that guns start shooting rainbows that make people happy instead of bullets that kill or anything (although that would be quite the sight to see.. you could imagine what a war would look like with that technology? An episode of my little pony, no doubt…) but I would quite enjoy it if I get a “thing” in the near future. What are some of your “thing”s? Or, if you don’t have one, do you want one? I’d love to know that I’m not the only one who thinks like this, so feel free to let me know 🙂

Love you all! Hope you enjoy your day with your “thing”s or lack thereof!

(photocredit to http://www.yorubagirldancing.com/)

Reward

Donning my jacket to go to work

a good man, a family man

I kiss my wife goodbye

Hug the kids and kiss them in turn

lovingly, happily

their breakfast stains my tie.

Head down the highway,

Snailing on, with music on

Playing my happy songs

Reaching to work at quarter to eight,

punctual, functional

My boss and I get along.

After five days the weekend comes,

at long last, my workload past

I make time for my family

go to the park and carry them to church,

religiously, every week

I think the Pastor likes me.

I thought I was a good person,

I don’t lie, I pay my tithes

I worked with every breath,

Then God finally showed me

how I was fooled, I saw the truth;

my only reward was death.

It’s very important for us to recognize that our works won’t save us. No amount of charity, good deeds or acts of kindness can change that we were born in sin, and that the only way for us to be free is through the blood of Jesus. Without the shedding of blood, we cannot be made clean again.

When God sent His son for us upon the cross, it was for OUR sin. He was perfect; but we all have faults, shortcomings and things that we can’t handle. This is the reason He made a way for us, that we can take on HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS, and He OUR SIN, so that because of His grace, we can see salvation, and an eternity ravished in His love for us with Him in heaven. So how do we reconcile ourselves? Trust in God; He’s got it all under control 🙂

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