It’s really been quite a while since I’ve come here. You know it’s been a while when you log in to a site and the UI changed heheh. Nevertheless, I’ve got quite a chunk of stuff on my mind, and from a lack of bleeding it out through my usual poetry or just plain talking it out, it’s really been rough.
Life is full of disappointments. To crown my recent batch of ‘lucky charms’ my tablet got a wee little crack on the screen just now and now it can’t function… like seriously JUST NOW happened. I’m really not amused by all this. It seriously has been one after another of unfortunate events. I feel as if Lemony Snicket has had his eyes on me. In the midst of all this, I’m still smack dab in the middle of finals in university, and so you could totally understand the humour of it all.
It’s just not funny.
About a couple of nights ago, I, due to foreseen but inevitable circumstances, spent an entire night on campus studying. This is not a norm for me, as I live about 45 minutes give or take from where I go to University, and commute via public transit. Aside from that, I hardly stay up all night… to study, at least. Within my one or two experiences, There was always this one thing that inspired me: the sunrise.
I don’t know if it was the fact that I just got through an entire night of no sleep or what, but seeing the sunrise was so invigorating. The cool of the morning calms you, the warmth of the rays of sunlight peeking over a navy horizon warms your heart and you get this feeling of triumph that’s inexplicable, but welcome. Perhaps, when finals are over and I have some free time on my hands, I might just stay up to see it once more.
How my life is right now, it feels as if it’s about 2am. The eleventh hour has long gone, and just about everyone you know is sleeping. But not you. You’re grappling with a bunch of things that perhaps, on a brighter day, wouldn’t be as big of a deal but right now, it’s killing you. Fatigue has set in, shoes off and lying comfortably in your couch while you wish you could lie comfortably in your bed, but to no avail. Your bed’s too far for you to use it now. There’s no way for you to turn back or run away. You just have to face your reality, with or without hope of brighter things to come.
Of course, there’s always the option of giving up. Regardless, it doesn’t chance the fact that it is 2am and you are stuck here for the while. Perhaps you may feel like I do. Perhaps you’re a little closer to daylight, or maybe you’re soaking in the radiant ecstasy of a day full of sunshine. Wherever you are, don’t forget to appreciate it, remembering that life isn’t simply as binary as day and night, but there are many times in between, that are all not guaranteed to last. Even in the darkest of times, there is always something, however faint, that can bring a little light to you. Even in the brightest of days, if we really wanted to, we could probably find something that isn’t so bright after all.
Most of all, never forget to look to the light of this world – Jesus Christ – for the courage and motivation to get back in, wherever you may be. He longs to help you through it all, and it’s as simple as asking Him. His help doesn’t necessarily mean that things will get easier, however. In fact, it is possible that things may get worse. One thing that you can be assured of, however, is that no matter what may come, He will be there with you to face it.
And that is quite reassuring indeed, if you ask me.