I sleep in the dark;
Of course I do. lose my shoes just getting home…
Late night; lights bright just wanna get some some rest.
Lights off in my bed where I lie awake
I stare into the blindness beyond
The blackness whispering to me
Silencing the whirs of my head
With the hush of visual tones and hum of my fan
Stretching out my hands toward my rest.
The thing that gets me is that i can’t find the peace
To recede within my sheets but my mind bleeds
With the insecurities that keep my mind captive;
Haemorrhaging my failures of the day gone past
A mental blast of inadequacy
My delinquency imprisoning me to the solitude of my own thoughts;
Courage lost; a tear flows down my cheek.
My sentence was repentance:
Begging for the mercies from my selfish crimes
But no matter how much time I’d spent
With heart rent to pieces,
My sheets covered none of my guilt.
My pillow was no comfort to me at all
Breeze blowing my mistakes in my face
I hate this place!
My penance brought back the remnants
Of flaws long since forsaken
Clung to the corners of my heart
Anchored to my boat that sailed nowhere near dreamland
Since this night began.
I simply wasn’t good enough.
I did not deserve the consolation of slumber
But to simply lie awake, in hunger
For something better for myself;
Knowing fully well that my grimy hands
Could never deserve the beauty that my heart desired
I kindled a fire that burned me inside.
Fully convinced that the problem in this world today
Was me, I asked for mercy
Reaching out to something, anything that
Would give an ear to unclean lips
and touch these fingertips with some semblance of hope
That a heart would cope with the life that buffeted him daily.
I tossed over mildly,
Too weak to turn fully
When I saw something that somewhat stirred me.
it was a light;
Dim at first but soon blinding me
Blinding the blindness so that I can see
That though I was filthy,
That someone loved me.
My grimy hands were clasped by nail pierced ones
lips cleansed by coals and chains undone
Because of One who said He has overcome
That my inadequacies were inconsistencies
Washed away by an act that made all things new;
For I was made to be a new creature
That finds rest when heavy laden.
My sheets were stripes
my pillow a stone that was rolled away
Because of someone who died on Calvary
And rose on the third day.
Tears were dried that night,
And hearts were mended.
My bed wasn’t really that comfortable,
But in it I was comforted.
I rolled to my side,
tucked right into a dreamy daze.
A smile creased my lips as i fell asleep,
Lost within His secret place.
Hey guys! I know i’ve been reaaaallly behind on my blog posts, so I hope this makes up for it 🙂 have a great day everyone!